BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE. BINGE.

this is just so so beautiful...

I absolutely adore this. It kinda represents the way I feel.

Life talk

I have the urge to purge since 2 days...The food yesterday was so so so bad! Those 10 of us are always meeting on Thursdays to have lunch together and jeez the "veggie-gratin" was so gross! Since then my stomach hurts and I have a feeling as me throwing up is just a matter of time. -.- 

What else? We had a meeting with the older students of the faculty of my second subject and god they're all so nice! We just kept laughing, talking, drinking tea/coffee and enjoy each-other's company. I think the range of age was between 2 (it was the little daughter of a student) to 40+... 

Tomorrow I am going to meet ma beloved brosis and then I really have to pack some things to move out part-time...despite of being a little afraid of this step I really don't know if I wanna do that. Sure everyone's happy if they can move out ASAP but tbh I really enjoyed to be around my family since I usually get to come home between 6 and 9 pm... I even had a friend for a flat near university. But I didn't wanna humiliate myself by asking my parents for a flat after they bought me a brandnew car...so yeah... Things are always complicated

Getting crashed by a car isn't on my bucket list anymore...

Life

Sometimes life gets really hard. 

So hard, you don't even remember what's worth living for. 

And then you struggle every single second... 

But sometimes life is easy. 

It almost seems like it loves you. 

Everyone around is nice to you, everything goes well and you can sometimes expect suprises to happen.

My life is at this point right now. 

Is it stressful? Oh you can bet in that!

Are there troubles any now and then? For  sure. 

But in general everything is just ok the way it is. I met so so many amazing people at university, my parents are doing  their very best to support me and I have wonderful people to talk to. 

BUT (how could we expect this post to end without a but?! ;P) there are still some nasty thoughts on my mind. 

Not being skinny, good, talented, intelligent, beautiful enough.  

It feels like I am subconsciously looking for flaws. Reasons to start starvation. And I'm not sure how to handle that whole situation. 

I want ti challenge myself tomorrow and see how everything goes on... 

XXX Sofia 

Here are some random pics :D :)

This was yesterday's fruit haul :D 

And here are some new workout clothes to motivate myself to do more sports...

And this is *suprise* *suprise* one of my "project blue room" IKEA bags.

(I have to admit: I really love the blueness of my room :D) 

I lost focus...

The last days were pretty exhausting...
There was a 4-day-beginngers-course and I had to be at university from 9 a.m. to at least 5 p.m.
Additionally the whole journey with the train was just killing me...
I had to change the trains for about 3 times and all in one that whole action made me burn at least 700 cals a day!

But there were nice aspects too of course!
I met so many amazing people and even got to meet them during leisure time. 
I had a sleepover at Pia´s apartment and we went to the cinema and afterward to a bar with Luisa and Valerie... 

I think it´s pretty predictable that I´m expecting my coming week to be as exciting as the week before!

Tomorrow we have Greater Aid, so I am very concerned about the food...
But it´s just tomorrow, right? It actually lasts for 3 days, but we will be meeting friends and family tomorrow... On Sunday I will be tutoring and giving swimming classes afterwards, and Monday´s uni, so it won´t be that bad I guess...

Generally I just recognised that I lost my focus on nutrition and sports. 
I have to work out regularly again and start banning processed foods out of my diet (I have been eating them a lot lately and forget about rt4)

Anyway, I wanna get back on track, and the best way of doing this is PLANNING!
I´ll release the plans here, after I wrote those and make sure to stick on them.

Bye for now, lovelies! 

xxx S