Sonntag, 15. März 2015


I just wrote a super long post about Istanbul and the circumstances here and how's everything doing and then my phone got into standby mode because I had to do something and now everything is gone -.-

I'll try to write a short summary anyways. 
I have been in istanbul for 3 weeks now and I really miss my family especially my brother. Luckily I'm going to see my mom and dad on Tuesday as soon as their plane arrives :) 
My brother won't be there though due to school... That's why we end up phoning for at least 3 times a week :D 

But i am really enjoying my time here. The weather is sometimes so hot I don't even need a jacket and I'm always on the go.
Having sleepovers every 2-3 days, being outside almost every single day, meeting new people, good weather and bombastic food... 

As beautiful and great this may be, there are some negative points too.
I think this whole being always outside made me kind of weak. Since last week I have very low energy levels, I'm waking up at 11 a.m. (if not later - whereas I was waking up at 6-8 a.m. In the first weeks) 
I have very dark circles under my eyes and I feel a little sluggish. But I think this has to do something with my eating habits too: it's nearly impossible to have vegan food here and I'm kinda shy here when it comes to making my own food.. That's why I mostly eat what the relatives/friends I'm staying at have cooked... But I want to change this. 

Let's have a look at the past few weeks: I gained about 5 kgs (due to the stressful time while writing my seminar paper and having exams) 
In Istanbul I gained just 1 kg but I think my stomach got bigger... I barely work out and eat fattier foods (which I can definetly see on my skin!) 
To sum everything up: I don't feel as fit and healthy and comfortable as I'm supposed to. So how am I gonna change this? I WILL stick to a positive mindset. I won't allow myself to hate my body or myself ever again because I'm simply not that person which this  disorder want s me to believe. 
I'm beautiful, intelligent, friendly, open minded and full of life. I'm breathing and I'm capable of doing amazing things. Whether it's just a smile to cheer someone up. 
I found out that it isn't about "not being the fates in class" anymore... It's about "being the fittest I have ever been" it's about "getting MYSELF into amazing shape for MYSELF". 
And I proud of myself for understanding this. I'm proud of who I am and I'm proud that I'm still willing to fight against this disorder every single day :) 

I have to go now but I'll share my thoughts on how I'm going to change my not so good eating habits these days and how I'll get into beast mode and working out again. 

Have a lovely day you all. 
Go outside and breathe! 
Because you only have one life lovelies! 


P.S. I'm thinking of turning completely blonde. My mom already made me dip dye hair before I flew. And now I'm thinking of cutting my hair (it's quite long now but I'd like it to be shoulder long maybe a little shorter) and have some blonde highlights in it :) 
Have you made good experiences with that hairstyle? 

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